Post by Jacquie on Oct 3, 2005 23:54:59 GMT -5
Standing Outside the Fire
A/N: This one-shot was requested by Zeronix off of fictionzone.org and naturally it is also dedicated to her! I tried Val, really I did! Oh yeah, this is a song-fic (naturally) and the song is: Standing Outside the Fire by Garth Brooks. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don’t own Beyblade or you, or Garth Brook’s song: Standing Outside the Fire.
*~*~*Prologue*~*~*
“Your mission, (Your first name), is to amalgamate yourself with the Bladebreakers and become a trustworthy companion to all of them. You must then gradually dig out all the information you can about the Bladebreakers and their beyblades. This mission will take place over a period of twelve months. Complete it and you will be released from your contract. Do you accept your mission?” A slightly cracked voice with a trace of malevolence laced into it confirmed with his pawn.
“Mission accepted sir.” The younger voice of a fifteen year old female affirmed in a toneless voice. She was ready for everything, and nothing would stop her from discharging that agreement on her head. In the silence of the night, her steps rang out from across the abandoned gymnasium. A smirk was placed on her delicate features as she handled the new toy she had been given. A metal top, it should be easy to master.
Standing outside the fire, would be her exact path of action. She needn’t get too involved with these boys, much less become scared and burned by them. She wouldn’t be so weak as to stoop to that level. Unlike her sister.
&*&*&*&*&*&*&
Well, so much for that resolution, you sighed as you picked at the grass by the pond in Tyson’s yard. Sixth months had passed and no matter how hard you had tried you couldn’t stop yourself from becoming involved with the Bladebreakers and Team Psychic. Now all you had to do was hope Salima didn’t blow your cover. Yes, Miss Congeniality was your sister, unlike you she was able to participate in everything out in the open and shine. You just worked in her shadow; in fact you worked in all the shadows of Team Psychic. It may have very well been the reason you were so cold to begin with. You didn’t get enough light or warmth and standing outside the fire during things didn’t help much either.
Truth be told, you had intricated yourself into the Bladebreakers lives a little too much, you had become a best friend to all of them. Well, minus Hilary and Kai that was; Hilary and you just didn’t hit it off (and it may have been because Hilary didn’t seem to fit in with the Bladebreakers and you tended to state your opinion aloud), and Kai was well, Kai. He was like you in ways (quiet, intelligent and generally cold), but you two weren’t all that similar. You were outright with your feelings about everything (you had learned to communicate a lot without the use of words) and he covered his up. Although you did find his ways rather intriguing, you’d have never admitted in a million years that you liked him (to anyone but yourself). The rest of the Bladebreakers were like brothers to you and thus you felt extremely guilty going behind their backs and collecting information to be used against them.
~We call them cool
Those hearts that have no scars to show
The ones that never do let go
And risk it the tables being turned~
Dealing with guilt wasn’t an easy thing, but your expertise in facial expressions and gestures allowed you to hide it perfectly, well almost perfectly, you had let it slip a few times. Thankfully nobody noticed, or so you thought, and life had gone on as it usually did. Well, today was the day, one month had gone by and it was time for the first report to be handed in. You were to meet Doctor B’s henchmen in the park no later than three pm sharp. You closed your eyes as you thought back through the entire month you had known the Bladebreakers. It really figured didn’t it? You had almost screwed up the mission that could grant you your freedom.
You had been having second thoughts about handing in your report. Betraying your friends. You snorted at this thought, betraying my friends? Since when have they been my friends? They’re just pawns for Doctor B’s plan and my contract, it’s not my fault they’re so naïve… So then why do I feel so guilty? You weren’t able to come up with an answer to your own question because footsteps behind you interrupted your thought process.
“(Your first name)? What are you doing up this early?” Oh yeah, it’s five am on a Monday morning, you reminded yourself as you dipped your hand into the pond and pushed the water around, creating lovely little ripples, trying to dodge the question. Truthfully you couldn’t sleep and that was because you were so restless about having to hand in your first report today, but you couldn’t tell him that.
“I woke up early.” You shrugged as you noticed the sun peaking over the horizon and turned to the blond-haired Max. “What are you doing out here so early? I would have expected after Kai’s training the other day you’d be sleeping till noon.”
“Watching the sunrise, look (Your first name), isn’t it cool?” You looked over at the horizon, and truthfully it was beautiful. You had never before seen such an awing sight, and had generally regarded nature as a waste of precious time unless you were thinking. Sitting under a willow tree or on the grass had always helped you think and decide on things, thus what you were doing now.
You shrugged, “It’s nice.”
“You know how similar you and Kai are, (Your first name)? It’s really weird.” Max exclaimed out of the blue. “Neither of you can admit anything is more interesting then ‘nice’ or ‘fine’! It drives Tyson crazy, you know that?”
“Of course it does Max, of course it does.” You answered and then paused a moment after taking in what Max had actually said, “It wouldn’t be quite so amusing if it didn’t. Although, I do have to object to being compared to Kai like that. We’re very different, that guy can’t admit his own feelings towards anything – even to himself I’m afraid. At least I have the common sense to realize what’s come over me, even if I don’t tell the world as Tyson does.”
“What do you mean (Your first name)?” You had gone too far and had now caught Max’s curiosity on a matter you didn’t wish to discuss. It was one of your unwritten rules in your unwritten book of ‘how to deal with the Bladebreakers’. Max didn’t mean to be nosy, this you were sure of, but sometimes he pushed the questions a little to far and thus it was better to not bring them up to begin with (and/or avoid them). Unfortunately this had slipped your mind, being that it was five am and you had only gotten about two hours worth of sleep the night before.
“It’s a long story Max, and I’d rather not discuss it, so let’s just drop it, okay?” Max’s eyes fell to the ground as he sat down next to you.
“But (Your first name), I won’t tell anyone; please?” Max had turned on the puppy dog eyes.
“No. Why do you of all people want to know anyways?” You looked him straight in the eye with an eyebrow raised. Puppy dog eyes had never worked on you, and they never would.
“Well, I don’t know you that well, and I want to know more about you as a person. I’m interested and curious.” Max told you blatantly, and maturely. You didn’t know which shocked you more, the thought of Max being more serious than usual or how blunt he was. Either one didn’t happen to often when it came to his curiosity.
“I’m sorry Max but my answer is final.” With that you removed yourself from your comfy seat on the grass and walked away from your ‘friend’.
“Why are you so closed up (Your first name)?” He paused and then continued, as his next words struck you in something you thought you had gotten rid of a while back; your heart. “You’re worse than Kai (even if you do talk more than him).”
You shook your head. Why would people do this to you? Why would they constantly badger you for information and friendship? What was the bloody point of it all? All it did was weaken you! Taking chances in relationships only wound up hurting somebody. Why should you take the chance of it being you?
~We call them fools
Who have to dance within the flame
Who chance the sorrow and the shame
That always come with getting burned~
Because, your mind answered, it’s human nature. Humans are naturally drawn together. You tried to protest at this but deep down inside you knew your brain was right. It was natural and you did want it. You wanted friends, true friends, friends that wouldn’t go behind your back. You wanted a relationship that wouldn’t end, where no one would get hurt! You didn’t want to take any chances. Period.
But its foolishness, everything ends and nothing on this earth has never been hurt before, you scolded yourself for your earlier thoughts as you turned to give Max a reaction.
“Leave me alone Max.” You replied as you walked out of the yard, “Tell the others I’ll be back by eight am.” Why were you so closed up? The question drifted around your mind as you dawdled along the sidewalk with no particular destination in mind. After a few minutes of pondering you came up with a few answers.
You didn’t want to get hurt, because you were afraid that you could not handle the pain of heartbreak. You didn’t like this one very much at all, because in your training had taught you that weakness was the greatest evil of all.
You were so wrapped up in your mission that you had not the time for anything else. Life and death were of no importance to you as long as you completed your mission. This one wasn’t completely true, although you lead even your employer to believe it was. You cared for people, you didn’t want to, but as you had told Max, you didn’t lie to yourself about your own feelings.
The third and final reason came to you in the form of people. You looked down at the valley of green grass and the playground where the community park lay. You watched the little children run around, jump and giggle as you sighed. I wish that I had been given that sort of freedom. Deep down inside you wanted to be free and not just from your contract but mentally. You wanted to have the freedom like Tyson did; the freedom to laugh and to shout and to goof off.
The freedom you knew you would never have as long as your mental barriers stood. They were part of your training and you knew it. Had you not been trained the way you were, you might have had a chance of breaking down the barrier that kept your mind chained heavily to reality. Having that sort of freedom would be like being a whole new person. Even after your mission, you decided, you couldn’t break down those barriers by yourself – never in a million years, no matter how strong you were.
Friends.
Ah yes, your brain seemed to have brought up the topic again. You glared at the ground, whilst trying to rid your mind of all thoughts of or related to relationships. Friends, why do people make them seem so important? Sure they sound nice and it is company to keep, but there’s one downside to everything. A phrase stuck out in your mind, it was one that you had many times recited during your training in human physiology: It is the nature of people to love, then destroy, then love again that which they value most. Why did I have to think about that, did I really want to be friends with the bladebreakers?
~But you got to be tough when consumed by desire
'Cause it's not enough just to stand outside the fire~
“No! No, I won’t!” You shouted at the sky as you took off in a sprint down the hard pavement. I won’t give in! I won’t! I need to complete this mission and I’m not going to let my emotions get in the way! You told yourself as your surroundings turned to incoherency and when you finally came back to reality you found yourself inside a forest. Where am I? I knew I shouldn’t have gotten so wrapped up in my ranting! You cursed as you tripped over a tree root and fell to the ground. Your knee stung as you looked it over, it was a small scratch nothing more. You got back up and looked around at the surrounding trees. If I follow the path I was just on, I should be back on the main road in no time, you figured. Boy, Tyson and the others must be pretty worried; you thought and then mentally slapped yourself for thinking such a thing. Why should I care anyways, you shrugged, it’s they’re problem if they worry about an enemy.
You started to walk, well limp rather, your knee hurt terribly, but you weren’t going to let it show, even if there wasn’t anyone around to watch your performance. You winced as you took a step down a small hill; pain sprang through out your body as you reached a clearing, and noted the main road up ahead. Well, I’m out, you sighed as you looked at the street signs…now which way was it to Tyson’s again? After all of that training, you’d think my sense of direction would have improved! You groaned, why did your life have to suck so much?
*&*&*&*&*&*&*
Fifteen minutes later, you walked through Tyson’s front gate, limping even more than you had been. Your assessment of a ‘little’ scratch, turned out to be an invalid measurement. Your watch told you in was ten am and on pure adrenaline you fixed your posture. You would not let them see that you were in pain; raw determination was the one similarity you had with Tyson (other that the fact that neither of you gave up even when it was hopeless).
“(Your first name)!” You heard Ray’s voice as you turned your head to the left and saw Ray come out of Tyson’s backyard followed by the rest of the Bladebreakers. “What happened to your knee?”
You looked down for the first time since you left the forest at your knee and squelch a wince. You were slightly grossed out at the sight of blood, but more in shock that your minor injury had bled all over your lower leg and you had more or less a hole in your knee cap. Not the bone literally, but you had definitely lost a lot a few layers of skin. Who would have thought a tree root could do so much?
Well, let’s keep up the charade and see if they buy it, you thought with a smirk. Playing games with these people was a lot of fun and there was no way in hell you were going to let them know that you had tripped over a tree branch. Yeah, that’d do wonders to my reputation; you shook your head and sighed. Let’s hope they’re as naïve as Doctor B said.
“It’s a scratch and I’ll live. As for what happened let’s just say I got into a little fight and this just happened to be the outcome.” A fight with a tree, you sweatdropped at the thought, well there was SOME truth to your little white lie at least.
“That’s not a scratch! You’re insane!” Tyson more or less screeched at you as he grabbed your hand and pulled you into the house as Ray, Max, Hilary and Kenny followed.
Kai just raised his eyebrows at the whole spectacle, making a note to get the truth out of you later. They might be so naïve as to accept your story, but he for one wasn’t. Besides, this whole passed month, he had noticed something about you. You were hiding something beneath your cold exterior and that something didn’t seem too good for the Bladebreakers team. You had dodged more questions than he did from Tyson in a year, that month. Something was wrong and he was going to find out what it was, even if he had to admit he liked you to the world. Well, okay maybe he wouldn’t go that far. But maybe…NO! He shouted as he shook his head and walked into the house where you and Tyson were arguing.
Okay, so Tyson was protesting and you were glaring. Close enough.
“Just let me help!”
“No.”
“But –”
“Read my lips,” You emphasized slowly and clearly. “I said no!” With that said, or rather snapped, you glared one last time and took the bandages with you to the washroom. Why did Tyson have to care so much? Why? Your thoughts screamed out; it almost made you feel guilty that you had snapped at him. Keyword: Almost.
~We call them strong
Those who can face this world alone
Who seem to get by on their own
Those who will never take the fall~
You started to run the tap water and picked out a dark blue washcloth from the cabinet so as the blood stains may not be seen on it. Running the water over the washcloth was the easy part; you resisted the urge to cry out as the warm cloth hit your wound. It didn’t just sting; no, it hurt worse than hell itself and you’d already been through that during your training. When you had thought it prepared you for everything you were wrong. Dead wrong.
A knock was heard on the door and you dabbed the last bit of blood off of your leg before answering it. Expecting to see Tyson (and or one of his little protestant buddies) you calmed yourself so that you would not lash out at them right away. Instead, you saw the one person that never in a million years would you have thought to want to help you. Kai Hiwatari. Go figure.
“Yes?” You raised one eyebrow expectantly.
“You know it’s impossible to wrap the bandage on your leg yourself.” He stated in a cool and knowing tone. You felt your cheeks heat up as you shoved the blush down (making a note to wonder about that later) and looked him coolly in the eye.
“Just what are you suggesting? Tyson is the most annoying person on the planet and who says I can’t do it myself?” You snapped as you tried to glare; unfortunately, it wasn’t very powerful, because for some reason or other you just couldn’t glare at this guy. It was odd and it was aggravating almost more so than Tyson. Now that is improbable, you told yourself as you returned your concentration to Kai Hiwatari.
“I do and if Tyson is so annoying, why are you still here?” His question rang in your ears as you almost out right gasped. He knew! He knew something wasn’t right and yet he was still playing games with you. Why? You seemed to be asking that question a lot lately, and you were really starting to hate it. You had never been with out this many answers in your entire life. It was driving you crazy! No. I won’t let him get to me; I won’t give into my emotions. That’s how I came under contract and lost my freedom, there is no way it is going to happen a second time! Not if I can help it!
You stared into his silver coated eyes and frowned, how were you to answer this question? “That would be none of your business Mr. Phlegmatic!” With that stated you ignored him and went back to dabbing the blood off of your knee as he walked up to you and took the bandages from your hand.
“I told you, it is impossible to bandage your own knee if it’s bleeding this badly. You aren’t at the right angle.” He reminded you as you saw a shimmer of something in his gray eyes; you weren’t sure what it was, but it seemed almost like a touch of curiosity. Him? Curiosity? As if; you dismissed the notion as if it were never there and turned your attention back to Kai who was slowly (and accurately) winding the bandage around your left knee. Once he had finished he stood up and looked at you. “What really happened?”
“Why would you care?” You asked in a suspicious tone as you turned to leave the room and then turned back. “Oh and before I forget, thanks.” With a nod of your head you walked off, contemplating on ways to kill Tyson. Or try to at least; you weren’t sure if Kai would like one of his bladers killed – no matter how annoying he was.
Little did you know that you had left Kai staring at your retreating figure. You were definitely strange; so why did he like you again?
*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*
You sighed as you stared at your watch, two forty-five pm; it was almost time to head down to the park. You were to meet them at three pm by the playground and hand over a folder containing your findings. That’s betrayal, a small voice in the back of your mind objected most sharply to your plan of action. It’s not betrayal! I wasn’t friends with them in the first place! Get over it!
Yes, but you want them as your friends and one maybe as a boyfriend, the voice cackled and you sighed.
Great, now I’m supposedly insane; listen, they are not my friends nor is Kai my boyfriend! You told yourself as you tried to keep your cool. Who knew you were so aggravating?
Mm-hm, which is why you knew who I was talking about, you could practically hear that little voice smirking. You almost screamed as you abandoned the argument and walked to your sleeping bag where you had hidden the folder. You made sure no one would come into the room whilst you were suffocating yourself and looking for the folder and then dove into the wooly, hot, and unoxygenated sleeping bag. Your hand finally after five minutes of searching grasped a beige, paper folder; it contained a ten paged report on the Bladebreakers. The basics on their bit-beasts, strengths, weaknesses, personalities, ages, and hair colors, you name it and it was probably in that report.